Well, unless you have just got off, you are a man.  Sorry to break that news to you, t-p

Tommo
X

I am now past Slough.  This is where it gets pretty.

Tommo

Of course, there's also the famous lines by Sir John Betjamen:

Slough

Come friendly bombs and fall on Slough!
It isn't fit for humans now,
There isn't grass to graze a cow.
Swarm over, Death!

Come, bombs and blow to smithereens
Those air -conditioned, bright canteens,
Tinned fruit, tinned meat, tinned milk, tinned beans,
Tinned minds, tinned breath.

Mess up the mess they call a town-
A house for ninety-seven down
And once a week a half a crown
For twenty years.

And get that man with double chin
Who'll always cheat and always win,
Who washes his repulsive skin
In women's tears:

And smash his desk of polished oak
And smash his hands so used to stroke
And stop his boring dirty joke
And make him yell.

But spare the bald young clerks who add
The profits of the stinking cad;
It's not their fault that they are mad,
They've tasted Hell.

It's not their fault they do not know
The birdsong from the radio,
It's not their fault they often go
To Maidenhead

And talk of sport and makes of cars
In various bogus-Tudor bars
And daren't look up and see the stars
But belch instead.

In labour-saving homes, with care
Their wives frizz out peroxide hair
And dry it in synthetic air
And paint their nails.

Come, friendly bombs and fall on Slough
To get it ready for the plough.
The cabbages are coming now;
The earth exhales.

This is the real t-p.

http://www.annanetrebko.com/

Erm, it is!

I went to Slough once. To hear an opera, of all reasons.

The only time I went to Milton Keynes was also to hear an opera (Birtwistle's The Last Supper, to be precise), though I also paid a visit to the big indoor shopping centre because it was December and the person I went with (a certain Cambridge professor of composition with the initials R.H.) wanted to look at the Christmas decorations to, in his words, 'see how the real people live'.

I think it was called Scenes from Keynes.

Kitty,
This is really difficult. I am organizing a praying meeting for you and your partner.
Things are going to sort themselves out. I am chanting now in a different language. It is going to help, I know.
Господи помилуй. Господи помилуй. Господи помилуй.
 And for the rest of us: Господи помилуй. Господи помилуй. Господи помилуй.

It is going to be all good from now on. You have nothing to worry about.