If I could just pop up very briefly in my role as Naive Everyman,
There's really no need for that, George - there's no such thing as 'Everyman' (or Everywoman), and 'naive' is hardly the first epithet that comes to mind with you, cute though it might be!
In no sense
at all is your view of this music any more or less valid than anyone else's, certainly not than those of use who are in one way or another professionally involved with it, which brings a whole set of other interests and biases into play.
I wish someone had told me that before about Stockhausen and as concisely and clearly as that. It would have saved an awful lot of bemusement and wondering what on earth I should be doing when listening to him. Can I assume that general description doesn't apply only to Stockhausen but, to a greater or lesser extent, to many other composers of his generation and later?
In the broadest sense, i think it can be said that a lot of contemporary music uses different organising principles, or at least different priorities in this respect, compared to various past music (not that that is by any means monolithic - the debates one hears about whether new music should have 'melody' or not are not in essence so different from those in past eras regarding the supremacy of contrapuntal intricacy, colourful orchestraion, or whatever else). Some music does have quite different aesthetic aims from what might loosely be called the mainstream Western canon, for sure (for example some of the more static Feldman works, some minimalist music, most of Cage, some of the radically pared-down work of Nicolaus A. Huber or Ernstalbrecht Stiebler, and so on), aiming for quite different categories of experience to that obtained previously, and as such requires a different attitude to the listening experience. But Stockhausen is less like that, I feel, at least in a lot of works: his music operates with relatively audible processes, goal-oriented structures, development of material, and so on. He just uses rather different means to bring them about, and assigns different priorities in terms of parameters (timbre, for example, is more central, so is texture - in a complex work like
Gruppen, hopefully, it shouldn't be too difficult to follow the interplays between textures, instrumental groups, and so on, when the piece is new, which lends a 'way in', allowing one to come to hear other things.
If that is what many(?) of you are doing, maybe it's because that (relatively easy to understand) message hasn't got across that there is so much puzzlement about what 'New Music' is on about. Or does it only fit Stockhausen?
It would be difficult to make highly general statements about 'New Music', at least at the present time - possibly future generations will see more unifying factors than we can when we are so much more close to it, as we do with music of previous eras. I would like to be able to say that simply the music alienates some because there are too many instilled preconceptions about what music 'ought' to be, based upon continual exposure to a Western classical canon - but to be honest I think that answer is too easy. One can also say such things like that those accustomed to free jazz/improvisation wouldn't find various things in Stockhausen and others difficult, but then one has to bear in mind that the audience for free jazz/improvisation relative to the rest of the population. I suppose it all comes down to want one looks for (or, better, what one is open to) from listening to a piece of music? In terms of 'what one is supposed to be doing' when listening to it, in the end I'd say simply one should keep an open mind, and be prepared to accept that it works somewhat differently from that with which one is familiar. Most of the best new music can be appreciated (or at least comprehended) to the highest extent by anyone who is prepared to take such an attitude, I believe (I would go further and say that that new music which it is impossible for the non-specialist to be able to comprehend is probably of lesser quality, but that debate has been gone over plenty elsewhere). There's no 'right way' or 'wrong way' to listen in the end, in terms of which aspects of the work are legislatively deemed to be unambiguously superior to others - just start with whatever seems striking, and if nothing is, then try a different piece!