Thanks A.  I'm ok 90% of the time.  I've learned to live with it.  Just very occasionally now I find myself tearing up but nothing like as bad as it used to be.

I'm as happy as it's possible to be without him and I have the youngster living with me - hopefully permanently - and various animals/birds.  I have a large and extended family and we all get on great and love each other dearly.  Life is ok!!

Thanks soundwave.  I shouldn't really have posted about this, especially in the happy thread.  I meant what I said though, there is nothing better in this world than being with the one you love.

I'm fine now most of the time.  It's seven years since he died young of cancer and I've realised lately that I'm never going to "get over it" but as I said before, I have learned to live with it and I think I do very well indeed.  I tried to make his photo my avatar, but I couldn't do it, then I tried to make my dog come up - I think all my pictures are too big.  I shall just have to make do with Charlie after all.  

I had exactly the same experience, Milly, but much longer ago - it must be 25 years now. Seven years is not very long at all, and you sound to me as if you are coping pretty well. I think it was about 4 years before I felt anything like normal. It is the most appalling shock, and to some extent it does alter your life for ever. Like most traumas, though, it teaches you a lot, even if only what is truly important in life.

I would say I'm happy most of the time now, but I've been lucky in some ways. I don't have a large family, but my parents didn't live too far away and helped no end with the children, although they were in their 70s. I also always had enough money - not a lot, but enough - and money is a huge problem for many people who are widowed young.

Thanks t-p. It's lovely to know that people care.  

Mary I'm sorry for you too.  Talking to other people does put things into perspective.  You realise you're not the only family to whom life has been unfair.

We were living in America when he was diagnosed but came home for treatment and I've stayed here because of the rest of the family.  Financially we're ok as well thank goodness.  Not rich by today's standards, but adequate.  As my old mum frequently says "if you're going to be miserable it might as well be in comfort".   How much worse would it be if on top of the grief you were hand to mouth trying to feed the children!  We have to count our blessings and you're right - it's certainly a whole new learning process.

I feel terrible for knocking this thread stone dead! 

This morning I am H A P P Y, I AM H A P P Y, I KNOW I AM, I'M SURE I AM, I AM H A P P YYYYYYY!!!!!!! 

I am happy today. There is no rain - that is number one.
I already more or less know my pieces for accompanying  - 2
This message board makes me happy, thank you all - 3

What else? Heard my piece beeing played on radio this morning 4

A lots of interesting people are around and no need to concentrate on disagreable things -5

Thank you all, I wish you are all well.
I love smileys, isnot Michael great for making the board?

So am I. Sunshine, blue skies and lots of



Even the supermarket wasn't too bad.

And viburnams... aren't they beautiful?



A